Index

Introduction

1: Opening Our Eyes

2: Lasting Pain

3: Clergy, in the Mirror

4: About Grief

• Knowledge Quiz
• Using Personal Experience
• The Grief Process
• Ebb & Flow
• Guilt and Grief
• Forgotten Grievers
• References and Resources

5: What Families Need

6: What Congregations Can Do

7: Professional Help

8: Lessons Learned

Lack of knowledge about the grief process - age old wisdom

The forgotten grievers

It is important to appropriately support children in dealing with an infant death whether a SIDS death or not. Encourage children to discuss their feelings. Sometimes children will feel that somehow something they thought or did might have contributed to the baby’s death and it is important to be able to address those feelings and thoughts immediately. Their concerns may include:

• Anxiety/fear: "Who will be next?"
• Anger at parents, god, baby and in general
• Death causation/survival guilt
• Regression